Baby Steps

I had made plans for this past week to attend a three-day training in Chicago;  flights were booked, reservations confirmed and vacations days approved.  I had eagerly anticipated this opportunity.

On the appointed day my plans were upset by weather delays at the San Francisco airport.  I missed my training event and wasted a day’s vacation from work sitting in a tiny airplane waiting for clearance to take off.

There was a time when a day like that would have left me irritated, angry, frustrated and depressed, in that order.  Amazingly, this time, I found myself waiting patiently to see what would develop, accepting that there were no available seats on later connecting flights, and simply feeling disappointed to have missed the event, but with a feeling that God was in control, so it was probably for the best.

How can I account for this change in my attitude?  It is because I’m not the person I used to be. I’m not even the same person I was just a year ago.  This is not due to some sudden,  dramatic conversion experience.  I was born anew when I accepted Christ many years ago.  The transformation I am experiencing is the product of my ever-increasing trust in God.

I strongly believe that when one makes the decision to believe in the God of the Old and New Testaments, he or she becomes a new creation, a newborn spiritual being. Newborns are not mature individuals, however.

My 11-month old granddaughter is learning to walk. With every new video my son sends me I see her strength and confidence grow.  It has been like that in my spiritual growth.

I have always been fairly strong-willed. As the mother of three equally strong-willed sons, I’ve seen the good and bad sides of such a personality. However, one of the benefits is that once we make up our minds, they are definitely made up.  When I made my choice for God, the struggle of belief was won… the battle of trust began in that same moment. I had to learn to walk with him.

The greatest single change between the old me, who would have been so devastated by my failed plans, and the woman who accepted the day’s disappointments with equanimity is that this woman knows she can trust God.

I believe to the marrow of my being that God is and that he knows and loves me. Whatever he allows in my life is for my good and his glory.

I am not saying that he sent the fog to thwart my plans, along with the plans of everyone else effected by the weather. But I do say that it was allowed to happen, filtered through his divine will, because there were lessons and blessings in it for each of us.

Rather than pouting or throwing a temper tantrum at God’s seeming indifference to my distress, as I would once have done, I can sit back and wait with patient anticipation to see what he has in store for me next.

I don’t mean to sound smug. I still have a lo-o-o-ng way to go. I’m trying to encourage you with the peace that comes from trust in God’s love… And with the real, practical impact it can have on your everyday life.

I’m sure that I will struggle in days ahead when plans go awry and treasured hopes are dashed. However, I am encouraged by the experiences of this past week, that I will be given the peace to go on, if I continue to trust evermore deeply in God’s loving care.

About Jonna Hawker Turek

I write Christian fiction under my maiden name, J.B. Hawker.
This entry was posted in Personal Musings, Spirituality and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink.

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